Flashback Friday

I have been sick and haven’t been able to run these past 4 days.  Actually, I’ve been sick for about a week, but I ran a couple times anyway.  Normally I would have forced a run in these past four days.  Because I NEED to run.  But I have a race this weekend that I really, really want to run.

There you have my reasons for my lack of blog entires.  No run; no blog.

I’ve been going to bed early, around 8/8:30, waking at 6 AM, to get breakfasts and lunches made for the boys.  And then while hubby, so thankfully, gets them off to school, I go back to bed until it’s time to get ready for work.  By then, I feel better.  By the time I arrive home however, I crawl back into bed early once again.

Today however is Friday, and I had to get some errands run.   Feeling much better, I woke for good at 11:30 AM and ventured out for a few hours.  Perhaps if I hadn’t kept up my strength training (THOUGH MINIMAL) during this illness, I would have recovered quicker.  And perhaps if I would have not run last week’s 21k, I would have been over this by the weekend.  But I couldn’t miss that race, and I couldn’t miss taking down the markers the following Monday.  The race gave me a $50 gift certificate, and the marker take down gave me a mountain run during the week!  Come Tuesday however, I crashed big time.

Back to the reason for the blog – Flashback Friday.  I began looking for a particular softball picture back from 1980 or so.  I’ve been searching this picture out for a couple years.  I know that it’s in my office, that AGAIN looks like a hurricane ran through it (as I now share my office with my husband and my dog.  LOL)  I didn’t find the picture, but I did notice something amusing among my old pictures.  There are an awful lot of poses of me standing on the front lawn of the house I grew up in.  It seems for every special occasion, I posed out front on the lawn.

I’ve picked two of those front lawn pictures for this Flashback Friday:

The first picture, I believe is the first day of high school.  That would make the date September 1979.  (High school for me was 9th through 12th grades):

The second picture was taken on my high school Graduation Day.  I graduated mid-term, January 1982, but I walked in the ceremony with the rest of my class, which means this picture was taken in June 1983:

Same front lawn, same person.  But really, a much different person from today. 

Turning the Tide

I have been sneezing all evening.  And I’m not a sneezer.  I hate sneezing.  I hate being “under the weather” even a tiny bit.  I use it as an excuse to be a glutton, eat junk food, drink wine or a really thick ale, and then tada – I’m even sicker.  Smart thinking eh?

I never claimed to be smart, though I may be smarter than the average bear.  (If you grew up in the U.S. and are about my age, this may make sense.).

Anyway, it took me a day to get over Saturday’s race performance.  Actually, my “performance” wasn’t terrible.  It was the mental defeat and physical breakdown that was terrible.  The sore throat lingered, and I slept A LOT before, and especially after the race.  But now, I’m scared to death of April’s 50k (which does a lot of the same trails as Saturday’s race).  So even in my fatigue and apparent “cold”, I worked hard on Sunday.  I worked hard on sleeping, eating right, ab work, glute work, upper body weight training, rolling, not to mention my household chores that were neglected all week long (because I worked every day – yay!!!).  It’s time for the tide to turn!

Today, I had a reprieve.  That is, I got to (yes, that’s “got to”, as in “was fortunate” to run with Steve Harvey again to take down the 21k race markers.  Yup the very race that nearly defeated me.). 

Aside from waiting for Steve at THE WRONG gate, I had a nice pleasant run, beneath cool, gray skies.  It was lovely.  And as usual, the company, grand.  To top it off, I got the added bonus of learning about new trails (& I thought I knew nearly all of them up there!  I suppose I will never know all of them).

Before I continue on with the pictures, because I took lots on this grey day, let me say this.  1)  Running the loop going DOWN West Horsethief, UP Trabuco, is a much more pleasant run than the reverse, 2) Running it lackadaisically with fun company is also a much more pleasant run than racing it in the opposite direction, and 3) Racing this weekend’s 21k pretty much scared the cra* out of me as far as April’s 50k is concerned, not to mention, my overall physical capabilities being way under par.  4)  I’m pretty much back to my “scared to death” status that had pretty much left me after my grand Saddleback Marathon comback.  5) And so, starting tomorrow, I’m putting on the ritz!  Natural foods, no cheese, no wine, and I’m adding lots more core and strength training (once again, but this time without a gym membership) to my regimen.

With that said (or rather written), back to today’s run.  The lovely pictures (have I ever mentioned how very, very fortunate I am – really.  I promised my son that I wouldn’t post this, but I must today.  Saturday, a few hours after the 21k as I lay on the couch resting, my son was hit by a car while riding his bike.  Thankfully, the driver was paying attention and hit the brakes in time so that my son landed on top of his hood.  No head injury, no problems whatsoever so far.  We are watching the bruise/bump on his leg – but again, so fortunate am I (not to mention he!)  He won’t read this blog, so therefore, won’t know that I posted this : ) : 

Taking down a marker on The Main Divide:

Running along The Main Divide:

Steve running the Main Divide:

East Holy Jim (If my memory serves me correctly – I gotta run this trail):

Heading down Horsethief (I decided not to post the picture of me giving Horsethief “the finger.”  Because I never really give anybody “the finger.”)

Horsethief really is beautiful:

Horsethief coming to an end:

Going up Trabuco, which I believe I’ve only done once before.  I’ve run down it many, many times.  Climbing Trabuco, oddly, I hardly recognized it:

(10.33 miles logged today):

Big Baz WTRS 21K

I had not run since I stopped my streak.  Then Friday afternoon I took the boys for a hike in Aliso/Wood Canyons.  Back at home I napped a good three hours.  I went to bed with a sore throat, feeling a little slow (you know, a tad dim-witted and slow moving). 

I woke at 5AM for Big Baz’s 21k trail race in the Cleveland National Forest this morning (Saturday).  My throat burned.  After gargling with diluted hydrogen peroxide, I took two motrin, drank some coffee and drove up the mountain early. 

Still, I felt confident, confident especially that I would beat last year’s time.  I hoped I’d beat it by about 15 minutes. Thing was, from the beginning of this trail race, I NEVER felt strong.  I thought it would come though – my strength that I felt for so, so many days in a row during the streak.

Pre-race:  Me, Baz, Judi, Matthew:

The ladies raring to go: Lisa, Me, Judi:

Running alongside Doug, headed for The Main Divide:

So many people passed me going up The Main Divide.  The main crowd got further and further away.  At that point, my strategy became to powerhouse down Trabuco.  And that isn’t easy.  There’s so many rocks and boulders, it’s an easy and dangerous place to fall.

I ran right past the aid station at the top of The Main Divide, leaving a few people behind.  Then I ran as fast as I could down Trabuco, repeating to myself, “kick out the back, kick out the back.”  I knew that the only way I wasn’t going to fall was if I didn’t drag my feet.  It’s impossible to drag your feet when you kick out the back. 

I passed 3 or 4 runners going down Trabuco.  Still I didn’t feel strong, especially when one of the trail workers who were cutting branches threw a branch onto the trail.  It hit my leg.  Simultaneously, the thin branch stuck into the ground in a way that the other end jabbed into my skin then cut down my shin.  It wasn’t a bad injury.  Still it altered my mood some in the negative way.  Yet I kept on running.  Really, what choice did I have?  I could have “chewed-out,” the worker.  But he didn’t do it on purpose.  I doubt he even knew what happened.

View running up The Main Divide:

Running down Trabuco Trail:

Crossing Trabuco to meet up with West Horsethief:

Horsethief got me again!

All along (meaning days leading up to this race and even this morning), I felt pretty confident about going up Horsethief.  I thought that I’d probably run all of it, taking it nice and easy.  Just like I had run it in training.

The trail’s beginning only has a slight incline.  And it was shady and leaf-littered.  A gorgeous sight.  When the climb began, I continued running.  Then, less than half way up, I began sucking air.  About that point, I got a nagging side stitch.  Finding it difficult not to focus on this pain, I concentrated on proper breathing, that is breathing from the diaphragm.  Then one of the runners I passed down Trabuco passed me going up Horsethief.  I felt pretty low.  Not only because another runner had passed me.  I also felt  low because I didn’t want to come in last, I continued to focus on the side stitch pain, and I wanted to quit!  But I can’t quit.  I just can’t!!!  So instead, the negative thoughts overcame me.  I thought to myself “You suck!”  This was very bad.  Really.  I said it to myself more than once, AND DID NOTHING to stop this terrible self talk. 

Running the beginning of Horsethief – hey this isn’t so bad!

Still not so bad, and oh so lovely:

I could feel or hear other runners I had passed coming up on me.  Every time I turned a corner on this hellish switch back, I ran as much as I could.  I figured if the runner behind me couldn’t see me when they turned the corner, they wouldn’t try so hard to catch me.  That seemed to work.

The last time I ran up West Horsethief, I couldn’t believe how short it seemed.  It rained that day, perhaps the rain helped in preoccupying my mind.  Today, I COULD NOT stay in the moment.  Instead, I seemed to focus on my suffering.  I staggered a few times.  Even stopped to take a few photos.  I wanted nothing more than that hellish trail to end. 

And then!  About 50 minutes later, I finally reached The Main Divide.  That’s right about when another runner passed me.

View going up Horsethief:

Another glorious view of this treacherous, hateful trail!

I’m REALLY despising it here:

I ran all of The Main Divide.  But I didn’t love it, that’s for sure.  What I did enjoy however, was the snow.  What I didn’t enjoy was not being able to the catch the lady that continuously ran just about a quarter to a half mile a head of me.  Though tempted, I did not stoop down and grab a handful of snow.  Perhaps I should have delighted in the snow more. 

View of Lake Elsinore from The Main Divide:

When I finally reached The Trabuco/Main Divide Intersection aid station, I stopped for a swig of Pepsi.  Then I grabbed a Styrofoam cup of Gatorade and ran downhill the remaining way.  My pace, as far as I know, never dropped below a 10 minute mile.  Even during the Saddleback Marathon, at this very point on the trails, I was running an 8 minute mile.  I could see about 5 runners down the hill some and tried to catch them.  But I COULD NOT.  I kept tripping and stumbling.  Obviously, I wasn’t kicking out the back.  Holding onto my now empty Styrofoam cup, I ran on in those last few miles, finally giving up on catching any runners.   I wanted more than anything to toss that cup, it bugged me so much.  But again, I JUST COULDN’T.

I finally ran across the finish line, completing this 21k two minutes slower than last year (3:17 / 3:19).  And as soon as I ran on in, Baz was hollering out my name, and my friends where pushing me through the crowd to pick up a prize that I had won – a $50 gift certificate to the running store, Snail’s Pace.  I had no idea how I won this.  This is what I said in my delirium, “Why did I win this?  For carrying this cup for 3 miles?”  Baz laughed and said, “No, for being the nicest lady here.”  I was kinda shoved in front of the camera and a photo was snapped of me and Baz (I’m kind of afraid to see this picture!)

Ahhhhh though.  How nice.  I’m sure I wasn’t the nicest lady there.  But I can surely use that gift certificate.

As a side note, my running friends did great:  Lisa, Judi, Matthew, Doug, Rich and many others.  Though some of them may not have felt they did great.  But compared to me, they did.  I truly felt defeated.

Streak Over

I suppose I should post something, since I know readers are SO EAGER to know whether I continued my streak after day 56.  (Kidding, I know you’re NOT THAT EAGER).

Truth is, day 56 was my last day of this running streak.  And I consider that an improvement in my minor OCD.  I didn’t HAVE TO end it on a number that ends with a 5 or a zero. 

Many things contributed to my decision to end this streak.  These are some that I can remember now.

1. I chaperoned my 4th grader’s field trip in the morning of day 57, thus couldn’t run in the morning, and I am a morning runner.
2. I worked that afternoon/evening, and it was cold and windy when I returned home well, WELL after sunset.
3. I felt there was no real reason to continue this streak since originally I had planned to run through January 1st.  Then I changed it to January 31st.  After that I changed it to 50 days.  At day 56, I simply thought, why?
4. I was beginning to lose the joy of running, thinking that I HAD TO RUN.  I don’t want to HAVE TO RUN.  I just want to run.
5. I felt it was time to move on to other goals:  1) my Tides to Towers run, 2) my absurd 1 mile of burpees, 3) and lastly, training for Twin Peaks 50 Miler (which entails at least 3 50k’s over the next several months).
6. And finally, I want to run for the joy of it, when I feel like it.  Not because I have to.  I feel like I accomplished what I needed to in this streak.  I proved to myself that I could run consecutive days without injury.  And really, that is most important to me.  NON-INJURY.

Thanks so much for following!  And for your encouragement.  I really, really couldn’t have done it without the readers of my blog.

Thanks again

The past few days I have let the body rest.  And I have been working (working as in earning money) – which I dearly need. 

Feeling a Fall

After scampering around town to get chores done before a long work day this afternoon, I drove to the local trails at Aliso/Wood Canyons.  And oh, what a joy to feel my feet hit the dirt.

Rarely do I record my falls anymore because they are usually tame.  And falls are so far and few between.  I used to keep count of my falls.  I doubt anyone has read this blog long enough to remember that.  Today though I must report that I fell.  I tripped on a silly little rock on Aliso Creek Trail.  And I didn’t notice that I was falling until I was past the point of saving it.  For those of you who have fallen on runs, you can probably relate to this.  For those of you who haven’t, hopefully you can too.  Lots goes through my mind during the split second before I eat dirt.  They aren’t actually thoughts though.  They are feelings that convey thoughts to my mind.

In the beginning, “There was the Word,” No, that’s not what I’m trying to convey.  When I began running and fell, I used to think/feel first off, “I can’t believe I’m falling!!”  I remember my first fall (on the road no less, before sunrise), I thought/felt, “”Whose gonna call the ambulance?” 

Things have changed.  I no longer think/feel, “I can’t believe I’m falling!”  Today when I fell on Aliso Creek Trail, I thought/felt, “Spread out the impact!”  The worst thing I can do falling, is to land on one point, say my knee or wrist.  I’ve watched my oldest son practice falling in taekwondo for years, and the thing that I’ve noticed is this:  they fall with a full body impact, whether they’re falling backward, forward, or on their sides.  It looks like it hurts.  But those boys/girls just pop up right afterward. 

Likewise today, I hit the ground making impact with my two hands and one knee simultaneously, with the other knee quickly hitting afterward.  And wouldn’t you know it.  I popped right up, just like my boy’s taekwondo lessons.

That was a great start to my run.  Really!  So I took off onto, you guessed it, Meadows Trail, onward to Mentally Sensitive, even though I had little time to make it back home, shower and head off to work. 

Mentally Sensitive of course, was a chore.  But what a lovely cool-weathered chore it was.  I didn’t need to stop running, nor did I need a rest.  I wore a low profile shoe, which I haven’t worn in a while.  It felt like I ran in slippers.  The skies were so dark and gloomy I couldn’t even see Saddleback Mountains.  The scenery was eerie, yet serene.   

I pushed myself a bit, just a bit, with time so limited.  And I ran across to “Top of the World” wanting to call hubby (because it’s pretty much tradition to call hubby when I reach The Top of the World – I did it the first time, and pretty much every time after that).  Today though I ran onward – first to beat the rain, and second to get home in time to shower and get ready for work.

Approaching the top of Mentally Sensitive:

Rain began to fall as I ran down West Ridge Trail to connect my loop.  I could hardly feel the rain as it fell down, though I could see it plenty.  Thing was, the rain drenched my clothing so much that I began to grow quite cold.  Finally at Mathis Trail, I took off my drenched long sleeves, and put on the rain jacket that I’ve been packing all along.  I stopped to strike a pose.  Then, not fifteen minutes later, the rain stopped!

9.86 miles run today (15.88 km)

Muhahahaha!

Running and Crying

I’m just a tiny bit OCD, not officially diagnosed and not medicated (for OCD anyway ), but I really think that I have some minor components.  One of the components is rearing its head in my streak.  Just as it has in the past with my mileage numbers.  For example, I like runs that end in even numbers.  I also prefer whole numbers.  But if not, I’d prefer the percent be divisible by a quarter.  For example, 10 miles is better than 9.87.  Likewise, 10.25, 10.50 or 10.75 miles I much prefer than say, to 10.45 miles.  These mileages are not a must for me, just preferences.  BUT I have been known to run around the parking lot in order to get such numbers on the garmin. 

Now, with this running streak, I oddly feel like I can’t end it unless I’ve completed a number of days that is divisible by 5 or 10.  Like today.  Today I completed 55 consecutive days of running.  Now, I can quit the streak.  If I run tomorrow, I won’t want to quit this streak.  I will want to keep on running until I complete day 60.  Then I can quit.

Usually, I laugh at these sort of things about myself.

Not so today.  My runs the past few days haven’t been doing their job in the mental health category. 

This afternoon, I went and let myself think while running and had a little crying episode, which I cannot do.  I cannot run and cry at the same time.  I know this. I’ve cried while running before and learned that when crying I can’t breathe well.  Today I thought I might hyperventilate and pass out right there on the highway after running the gorgeous beaches.  So I got myself straight right away.  How did I do that?  I stopped thinking.

I am okay.  And things will get better.  Life is hard, which is one of the reasons I run – not to make it harder, but to make it easier.  Besides, I have more to smile for than not; I have so many things to be grateful for!

Yesterday was my middle baby’s birthday.  He turned ten – Happy Birthday Dare-Bear.  

Miles run today:  4.44 (yesterday 1.13) Taking it easy.  Which is A-OK.

This afternoon’s run: