I Am So Weird

I remember as a child asking friends, “Do you think I’m weird?”  I so didn’t want to be “weird.”  Having grown up, I now KNOW that I’m weird, and it’s not so bad.  I don’t even care.  In fact it’s kind of fun.  People, my friends, sometimes look at me questioningly with an expression on their faces that says, “What the heck?” 

Even though, I can hide my weirdness and behave normally at any given moment, I’ve grown accustomed to being “weird.”  We all know it – I’m out of the closet, my friends and family know, my students know, the neighbors probably know.  It’s gotten to a point that I’ve forgotten all about being weird. (I sense that most runners are weird – just a hunch).   

And then this morning . . . I woke at 4AM, drank two cups of coffee, surfed the internet.  I made a Chia Fresca, packed, laced up my trail shoes.  Then I got in my truck and headed toward the mountains for a 15 mile run out of Trabuco Canyon.  I wanted to check on my water stashes. 

I drove nearly an hour under darkness, paid money to drive the toll road.  The sun had not yet risen when I reached the mouth of the canyon.  I found the gravel road particularly dark and desolate.  There’s usually headlights here and there when I drive it.  I wasn’t looking forward to the off road portion when suddenly, and I mean in an instant I decided I didn’t want to be alone today.  I could not bare loneliness.  I did not hesitate one bit, or put another thought into it as I did a three-point turn and drove back out of the canyon.  I took the toll toad home, and thought to myself, I AM SO WEIRD. 

Back at home, everyone in the house was still asleep as I changed into some sleeping clothes and went back to bed. 

This is my “running” story for today.

My husband said that I shouldn’t feel badly, that I should always go with my “gut” feeling.  There was a reason, he said, that I got that feeling.  He liked that I acted on it.

Who’s the weird one now?